Bike Survey

Questions sent to me by Janet. Here goes...

If you could have any one — and only one — bike in the world, what would it be?
Easy, a cyclocross rig. Road, dirt, mud, snow. Bring it on.

Do you already have that coveted dream bike? If so, is it everything you hoped it would be? If not, are you working toward getting it? If you’re not working toward getting it, why not?
You never have the dream bike because once you do you want the next one. That being said, my KHS Team XC is pretty fly. And the ladies love my 1972 Schwinn Stingray.

If you had to choose one — and only one — bike route to do every day for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why?
I'd start at the Slickrock Cafe after breakfast (Hungry Biker + lots of coffee), head down Main St and up towards Slickrock to Porcupine Rim. Rock the PR all the way down to the highway and follow the river back to Moab. Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

What kind of sick person would force another person to ride one and only one bike ride to to do for the rest of her / his life?
I'll have to say, Yo Momma.

Do you ride both road and mountain bikes? If both, which do you prefer and why? If only one or the other, why are you so narrowminded.
Both. I prefer road bikes on the road and mountain bikes off road. I'm funny like that. Both have their own unique vibe, and doing both makes you appreciate the other even more. Either way, you're not on the couch or in a car, so it's all good.

Have you ever ridden a recumbent? If so, why? If not, describe the circumstances under which you would ride a recumbent?
No, no, and Hell No. I also do not make eye contact with or acknowledge the existence of anyone riding a R-Word.

Have you ever raced a triathlon? If so, have you also ever tried strangling yourself with dental floss?
I only run when being chased by someone trying to take my lunch money. Although I do look good in my Fishnet Speedo Junior...

Suppose you were forced to either give up ice cream or bicycles for the rest of your life. Which would you give up, and why.
Ice cream, because bikes don't give me brain freeze.

What is a question you think this questionnaire should have asked, but has not? Also, answer it.
If a train leaves Chicago at 9:30am traveling west at 60 mph and another train leaves Seattle at 10:30am traveling east at 50 mph, what is the name of the passenger sitting in the 3rd seat of the dining car on the eastbound train? Answer: Yo Momma.

What do you drink during the post-ride social? Beer or wine?
Water. Endurox R4. Heineken or Fat Tire Pale. Not necessarily in that order.

You’re riding your bike in the wilderness (if you’re a roadie, you’re on a road, but otherwise the surroundings are quite wilderness-like) and you see a bear. The bear sees you. What do you do?
If I'm on the road, I sit in and draft off the bear. If I'm on the mtb I slow down to see if he really does shit in the woods.